“For the third time, I’m a vegetarian.”

“Oh, my bad. No big deal, I think they have a few salad options somewhere.”

As he slowly turned in his chair to give the clock yet another long stare, the oily stench of his patchy hair hit me and I shifted positions so I could lean as far back in my chair as possible and hold my breath without making my utter distaste too obvious. His sausage fingers reached up to itch the rolls of fat on the back of his neck, and he squinted to see the clock’s hands more clearly. While he was still facing away, I mentally began slapping my best friend for setting me up with such a nightmare of a date; we always played pranks on each other, but being set up with a man who was entirely repulsive in more ways than one was definitely crossing the line.

“So do you know what you want, or…?”

I ignored him, and chose to speak to the waiter who was approaching us instead.

“Hi! My name is Tony and I’ll be your server for today. Are you both ready to order?”

“Umm, yeah I think I’ll just order for her. She’ll have...“

I winced internally at the sound of his voice, and sliced through it with my own. As if I would let him speak for me and choose the food that I would consume -- what a joke.

“Yes hi, I’ll take your specialty garden salad please, with dressing on the side.”

My date looked a bit stunned at my outburst, and his chauvinistic temperament bubbled to the surface when his eyebrows twisted in an incredulous expression. I could almost read his mind, and visualize his distasteful thoughts form as he wondered how a woman could be so forward. He straightened his shoulders, cleared his throat, and shifted in his seat, itching to place his own order.

“I’ll take one of your largest grilled salmon and the lobster.”

The waiter nodded and walked off, leaving us with a silence so awkward that I could feel it in the thickness of the air. I made no attempts at conversation, and mentally calculated the least amount of time it would take us to leave the restaurant and go our separate ways.